Quick Joke

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Maynar
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Quick Joke

Postby Maynar » Sat Feb 02, 2013 10:34 pm

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A mobile phone rings on the bench, a man picks it up, engages the hands-free and everyone in the room stops to listen.

Man: Hello?

Woman: Babe its me, are you at the golf club?

Man: Yes

Woman: I'm at the shopping center now and found this beautiful leather coat. It's only 1000 can I buy it?

Man: Sure, go ahead if you like it that much.

Woman: I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2013 models, I saw one i really liked.

Man: How much?

Woman: 60,000

Man: Ok but for that much I want it with all the extra's

Woman: Great! Oh and one last thing, the house we wanted last year is back on the market. They're asking 950,000?

Man: Well then, go ahead and give them an offer. But only offer 900,000

Woman: Ohhh thank you so much, I love you!

Man: Ok bye, love you too.

The man hangs up the phone, all the other men in the locker room are looking at him in astonishment.

Then he asks: "Anybody know whose phone this is?"
I am Brother Maynar, keeper of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. And the number of the counting, shall be three.

It is by will alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of java that thoughts acquire speed, the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning. It is by will alone I set my mind in motion.

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liquidator96
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Re: Quick Joke

Postby liquidator96 » Sat Feb 02, 2013 11:57 pm

Mega Lols!

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Moon
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Re: Quick Joke

Postby Moon » Sun Feb 03, 2013 2:29 am

It sure as hell wasn't my phone...Mrs 'Moon' knows what my answers would have been and each one would have had two words, the second being off. :D
"Wise men speak because they have something to say: fools because they have to say something"...Plato

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the blade master
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Re: Quick Joke

Postby the blade master » Sun Feb 03, 2013 5:09 am

would that be something similar to intercourse moon :D
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a wise man can learn more from a foolish answer than a fool can from a wise answer
the only time a fisherman tells the truth is when he calls another fisherman a liar

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liquidator96
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Re: Quick Joke

Postby liquidator96 » Sun Feb 03, 2013 12:14 pm

Rofl, :D

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Geordie Ross
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Re: Quick Joke

Postby Geordie Ross » Sun Feb 03, 2013 2:11 pm

Ahahaha!
War does not determine who is right, only who is left.

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gooseman
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Re: Quick Joke

Postby gooseman » Sun Feb 03, 2013 11:21 pm

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da gooseman

Maynar
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Location: Surrey, British Columbia, Canada

Re: Quick Joke

Postby Maynar » Tue Feb 05, 2013 4:30 am

A lovely respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist and said, “I'd like to buy some cyanide."
The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?”

The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband."
The pharmacist's eyes got big and he explained, "I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband, that's against the law! I'll lose my license! They'll throw both of us in jail! You CANNOT have any cyanide!"

The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.

The pharmacist looked at the picture and said, "You didn't tell me you had a prescription."
I am Brother Maynar, keeper of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. And the number of the counting, shall be three.

It is by will alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of java that thoughts acquire speed, the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning. It is by will alone I set my mind in motion.

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Moon
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Re: Quick Joke

Postby Moon » Wed Feb 06, 2013 2:11 pm

"Wise men speak because they have something to say: fools because they have to say something"...Plato

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liquidator96
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Re: Quick Joke

Postby liquidator96 » Wed Feb 06, 2013 2:38 pm

Bungle's sure let himself go!

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Moon
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Re: Quick Joke

Postby Moon » Wed Feb 06, 2013 2:50 pm

Makes ya wonder sometimes, don't it? :S

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pl ... ey35bBWXls
"Wise men speak because they have something to say: fools because they have to say something"...Plato

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liquidator96
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Re: Quick Joke

Postby liquidator96 » Wed Feb 06, 2013 7:27 pm

She still did far better than George Bush would!

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the blade master
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Re: Quick Joke

Postby the blade master » Wed Feb 06, 2013 10:07 pm

teacher in the class room asks johnny to use the word facinate in a sentence
yes miss my sisters blouse has nine buttons but because her tits are so big she can only fasten eight :D
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a wise man can learn more from a foolish answer than a fool can from a wise answer
the only time a fisherman tells the truth is when he calls another fisherman a liar

Maynar
Posts: 79
Joined: Sun Jan 06, 2013 4:18 pm
Location: Surrey, British Columbia, Canada

Re: Quick Joke

Postby Maynar » Thu Feb 07, 2013 3:11 am

Moon wrote:Maynar...is this you? :D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eryxAcsTcOA



The striped underwear gave me away, didn't it?
I am Brother Maynar, keeper of the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch. And the number of the counting, shall be three.

It is by will alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the beans of java that thoughts acquire speed, the hands acquire shakes, the shakes become a warning. It is by will alone I set my mind in motion.

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Moon
Posts: 2851
Joined: Sun Apr 24, 2005 2:57 pm
Location: In orbit

Re: Quick Joke

Postby Moon » Fri Feb 08, 2013 1:52 pm

Maynar wrote:
Moon wrote:Maynar...is this you? :D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eryxAcsTcOA



The striped underwear gave me away, didn't it?

Does it every time. :mrgreen:
"Wise men speak because they have something to say: fools because they have to say something"...Plato


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